I tried not to look

Today is one of those days my mind wanders back to when I had more than I have now. But then I wonder if that was ever really true. Yes, there were times I wanted to give up when everything seemed to be insurmountable. Funny how that molehill in front of you becomes a mountain when things pile up faster than you can knock them down. If there’s one thing living out of an RV taught me, it’s that you are more resilient than you give yourself credit for.

Too many times I see and hear people beating themselves up over things they may not have control over. Getting caught up on past events won’t help you move forward. I think back to what my great-grandfather used to tell me. 97 years old and the man had seen more hells than I could imagine but he always listened to what the young had to say. He said to me when I was 14 “You may not have riches that be counted in money but your life can be rich with experiences. Those experiences are teachers even if the lesson is ugly. Some come to teach hate and others dwell in fear but don’t forget that love will beat them all. If you didn’t have these experiences, you won’t learn anything.”

Back then I had no idea what he was really saying but I do now. I used to be in the habit of not wanting to see the ugly I knew was all around me. Then I remembered a saying I once read that said that all sunshine and no rain makes a desert….Guess that’s what inspired this poem:

I tried not to look

I tried not to look

Into the eyes

Of pain and suffering


But something about

The color of lost souls

Wouldn’t let me go


Maybe it’s because I see

So much of myself

In them


And it doesn’t matter what others say

When you don’t really have

A place to stay


Home is a four letter word

Often misunderstood

Be careful how it’s used


It’s not a person, place or noun

It’s a way of thinking

Until you’ve found


That special place deep inside

The one that can’t be taken



If you’re lucky, really, really, lucky

You might find

A partner for the journey


To calm the silent louds

That won’t go astray

Even when tomorrow is today


Hang on to the parts of you

Slipping through your grasp

There’s still so much to do


Once upon a time

I was one who took

Too much for granted and


I tried not to look


About invisibull

Let's see now, what should I say on here to make people think I'm more interesting than I actually am...I'm a single mother of two with a passion for helping others less fortunate than myself. I like to write, finished a book and am working on another. Other than that I live a real-life video game where the goal is to get out of homelessness and provide a better future for my kids. Peace!
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2 Responses to I tried not to look

  1. tina says:

    This is absolutely beautiful Carey

  2. Query Eve says:

    That gave me goosebumps, I totally relate

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